MONEY!!!!!!

Yes!! I know everybody needs money well maybe a rich or comfortable person could read this message and tell me other then working the 40 + hours a week I work how can I make some money please let me know. I mean do I really have to be broke forever and a day or can I finally climb my black ass out of a recession that has been going on for the last 28 years of my life ( yes i am just 28 so WHAT). I need some LEGAL I repeat LEGAL guaranteed ways to gather some quick cash. I have an opportunity to add a part time (20 to 30 hours a week) job to my schedule this will ultimately help me increase the funds coming into my home, but I need start up money so that I can buy a few items to do the job. i.e. computer, software, etc. I will be a bookkeeper for a detail shop. This will give me extra experience for my job and it would be great for me. I also want to finish school online and of course need a computer for that. I am trying to help myself, but it is not working the way I need it too!! Somebody please help.



P.S. Just venting I wish somebody could or would help me i really need it. :-)


Smooches,

Carmel Beauty

I am apart of the living, sort of.

Hey All,

Thank you all for the prayers, kind words, and advice. It was appreciated and most needed. I have spoken with my hubby and we have come to the agreement that he will not read my journal. I have personally will just not write in my diary anymore. I am glad that he is not aware of this site which is why I write without names.

In other news my job is a TRIP, but I am thankful that I have one. I went to the beach this weekend. We really needed to get away and it was GRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAATTT!! We really had a good time and I had a chance to just veg out and look at the water. It wasn't even all that cold we slept with the door open all night. It was a 3 hour drive that took us from 8pm till 3am. If you can't tell we got lost.

Theory of the day: Beggers: People or animals (cats, dogs, etc.) who request very strongly on a continual basis for any and everything.

My theory is that these people are made if you don't want them in your life then don't make them. You create the monster then can't deal with the consequences. You can't let people "use" you then expect them to try to make it on their own that is not going to happen. So in that case it is best not to start something you can't continue. Now I am not saying you don't help people every once in a while, but these are people who are trying to do things for themselves and just need help.

Okay so if you haven't figured it out I did that with someone close to me and now I just want them to leave me alone when it concerns money all together. I am sure somebody understands my pain.


SMOOCHES,

CARMEL BEAUTY

What's going on?

Okay Everyone,

Yeah I know I have been MIA, but a lot has been going on and it looks as though it may get even more crazy in the next couple of months. For instance, I got the job which is exactly what I have been wanting and def needing.

In other news I am pregnant. I have only told my husband who couldn't keep his big mouth shut and decided to tell his mother and sister.

Well with me being a new mother soon and all the stress at work I have been a BITCH to my husband. He was home for the holidays and just went back on the road a little while ago. She I am the one at home I of course am in charge of paying the bills will with our car insurance I was $50 off from the amount we had to pay and what I set aside to pay. Which means that I have $30 to last until my next payday which is not until the 23rd of this month. We both only get paid once a month so this is going to be a very hard month.

Anywho, I have been trying to control my anger and have not been doing very well. I am worried with the economy things in our household have been very tight. My daughter has also not been very happy lately. She recently turned turned 2years so as you can imagine she is going through the terrible two's.



Question of the day: " How do you apologize when you don't want to?"


Smooches,

Carmel Beauty

TIME!

Have you ever noticed that when you are waiting on something that you really want time seems to stand still at a pace that even a turtle could surpass? On the other hand when you are having the most fun in your life it all seems to go by so quickly most of it seems to be a blur of never-ending activity. Well right now waiting to hear about this job is killing me. I want a decision ASAP so that I can move on with my life. Even though I am 85% positive I am not going to get the job, it is hard to shake that 15% because I really want it. Since the possiablility still lingers that I can get the position it is making it hard for me to forget about it and concentrate on more important things.

In other news I am very angry someone has stolen my daughter's earrings out of her ears. The reason I know this is because they are the safety earrings that she can't take out even if she wanted to and they are missing. I can't believe someone would steal from a child of 22 months what in the world is this world coming to. It pisses me off and If I happen to find the person he had the audacity to steal from my baby I will beat the shit out of them and deal with the consequences later. It's not like they were expensive, but it is the principal of the issue.

Well this is the end of my post because I really didn't have time to write this but I needed to share my frustration.


Smooches,

Carmel Beauty

Tell me what you think

Hey fellow bloggers,


I have been speaking about a job that I have applied for here in my current section. Anywho I had an interview last week Tuesday. I went into the interview knowing that most likely I would not get the position. I am not quite qualified yet, but I still had high hopes because I am the only inside person applying for the position and I am very talented (I am humble but since you really don't know me I have to tell it like it is so you can understand where I am coming from) smart and ambitious. So I went to the interview and it went good for the most part then came the end of the interview. I was interviewed by my current supervisor. So he said this " I don't want you to be discouraged if you don't get the job. I understand that you want something with more of a challenge and in the next coming weeks we have several positions that are coming open that may be more suited to your level of experience. I also wanted to let you know that I have recognized all of the hard work you have put in. I love the level of imitative that you have shown and hope to be able to reward you with a monetary increase in the near future. You are one of the top two or three people that I feel deserve an increase and I plan to do what I can to get you one. " Now of course this was not word for word but it is basically what he said. So I took it to mean that I did not get the job.

In other news my angel is allergic to mosquitoes. It is itching her so bad she has already been to the doctor twice. What is a mother to do when her baby is hurting? My husband and grandmother are making progress. She is talking about him again and speaking to him. Also yesterday at church (we haven't picked a church home yet, but we go to both of our parents churches for the time being) the past prayed for us and took time out to talk about some problems we have been going through (not with our marriage) and it really helped us both.


Question of the day: From what I told you what do you think about my chances of getting the job?


Smooches,

Carmel Beauty

PISSED!!

Okay first things first I passed both of my classes, but I wish I had done better in my Accounting class. I mean I passed with a C but I have always been a A/B student plus I am a type A personality so a C just doesn't sit well with me. I did get a A- in my public speaking class so that made me feel a little bit better.

Second I did get most of my money, but not all and now you guessed it I am broke. I mean literally. All my bills are paid, but I need some money.

Third I HATE MY JOB. One of the people I work with is leaving for a different job and I want her job. I should have the first choice, because I have the time on the job since I have been there for a while. She is a temp a new temp at that so why is my supervisor training her to do the job. I mean taking her to meeting and having her work with the girl that is leaving giving her the information to do the job. I think it is completely unfair that he is doing this. I want/need this job. I have worked my ass off for over two years at this job and this is the thanks that I get.

Anywhoo I have to VOTE tomorrow can't wait. Nothing exciting to say married life is a little boring but a good boring. I love my husband so much.

Question of the day: How long does it take for the newness to wear off? I hope never I am already looking into things to keep it juicy as little Wayne would say.


SMOOCHES,

CARMEL BEAUTY

PAY DAY! MAYBE?

I get paid once a month it is always seems to take forever for me to get paid. This month we are using a new payroll system different departments were placed on this system at different times and well it has been a disaster at least the first couple of months. I tell you this to say that I will and I mean will go the FUCK off if my money is not in my account in the next 53 minutes. Yes I am up at 11:07pm and will be up till 12am just to make sure my money is deposited as it should. See I am one very broke sister. No matter how much we budget throughout the month with the price of everything and I do mean everything raising it never seems to make it past the third sometimes second week of the month. Just pray for me as I will for you because our economy sucks and is getting worse by the day.

Anywhoo, I hope everyone is going to vote no matter who you are voting for please please VOTE!!!.


QUESTION OF THE DAY: I am only 27 years old and I find myself thinking of the past as the better times. So I am wondering like me do you miss things like the Cosby show, the wonder years, saved by the bell, gas at approx $1.50 a gallon, salt n' pepa, and just a simpler time when you didn't have to decide food or gas?



SMOOCHES,

CARMEL BEAUTY

Test!

So lately I feel like my life is one big test. I was recently married and now I feel like I am being tested on whether or not I can be a good wife. This test is not coming from my husband, but from his family and mine. Then he is being tested of course to make sure he will be a good husband. I wonder is this an ongoings test that you only pass after death or at some point do they trust you.

My other test well this is my last week at school for this semester. So I had a test today and my last one is on Wednesday. School has been kicking my butt. I mean being a mom is a 24/7 all by itself add work, husband, me time and well I am tired. It has been worth it though, because in the end I will be able to get a much better paying job.

In other news my job is still crazy Dory has an assistant now and she is basically doing all of her work. Dory might as well stay home for all the work she does. People are leaving left and right at my job in the last year alone I believe that of a crew of 15 we have lost 5 people. Ah well some are missed, if only because there replacement SUCKS!!!!

Now to the down side to my recent marriage me and him are actually doing better than ever, but my grandmother is Highly upset by our union. We eloped and she was not happy about that. I tired to explain that it was about us and we didn't want to wait any longer. She is barely speaking to me and that kind of hurts my feelings. She has always been controlling and judgemental, but since the death of my grandfather it has gotten worse. I think he mellowed her out a little. Hopefully she calms down a little.

Question of the day: How do you deal with your in-laws or your significant others family? I ask because my husbands sister is a BITCH and I a
m trying not to kick her ass. Help!!!

HEY BARNEY


SMOOCHES,

CARMEL BEAUTY

Wishing you a Merry Christmas!!

All things considered this christmas was very good. They had a vigil at my chruch last week for my grandfather. It was nice I did not want to go at first, but after the fact I was glad that I did. It gave me a sense of peace. My baby was showed some love this christmas not that she needed to much more toys, but hey she was happy so I was happy. Then my mom got me a DVD player which was nice. It made me laugh it stays in the car though I be damned it someone steals anything else from me. :-) Work is boring it's like only four people here until the 2nd of January. I have like nobody to talk to and tons of work I don't want to do. Well it's time to go home and since I do want to do that I will say



Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

Life or something like it!

Hey Everybody,

Sorry I have have been MIA I hate it when my fellow bloggers do that, but it could not be helped. My little Angel turned 1 on 10/09 so I have been busy being a first time parent spending more money then is necessary on a party she will NEVER remember. Also I don't know if I have mentioned it before, but when I went into labor with my daughter my sister in law was also pregnant and when she came to visit me. Guess what she went into labor and had her baby HOURS before I had my angel. So guess what I was one PISSED person that day. Anywho me and the sister in law do not get along never have and probably never will. Well needless to say everyone wanted to throw there parties on the same day and my gut told me to say NO well I didn't listen and the party did not make my angel happy. She is always just about ready to cunk out after day care because she doesn't sleep well with others in the room she is just to nosy. Anywho she cried almost the whole time. Now for a little more background information the Mama STBH mama treats her grandchildren differently. For instance she has four grand kids one is me and STBH the other four are the sister in law's. Me and STBH called her the other day and she told us she wanted to spend time with her grand kids so she went to pick up the other three. Mind you she has NEVER come to get my baby and spend time with her. So you know that the party was not my favorite. She bought my precious prissy little girl who did not even want to get cake and icing on her hands a little boy motorcycle. I mean it is red and blue and has peddles this for a little girl who just took her first steps 2 months ago. But the other little girl she bought a little pink and green bike without peddles that can be pushed from behind. That is just one of the ways that tried to play my baby that day so needless to say I was ready to open a can of whup your motherfucking ass before I left.

In other news have you heard about the boy shooting up the school. This is just too much I am such a worrier and I don't know how I will be able to send my daughter to school when the time comes I have a problem sending her to day care now.

Question of the day: We have a new lady in our department who is annoying and just a little off. This chick is so bad they through a party for her when she left her other department. Am I destined to end up working with the dumbest, most annoying, ungrateful, unable to do anything for themselves, lazy, and crazy people in America? If so do you think I could plead bad luck in my defense when I crack the fuck up and go postal on everyone?


Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!

I SCREAMED WHILE DOING THE HAPPY DANCE!!!!!

So my bad day turned out to not be as bad as I thought it was. I mean I got the job so my interview couldn't have been that bad right? Anywho, I have been super busy trying to get my office together sign all the new paper work. Life has just been a big mess for me. My daughter also potentially has another ear infection. If she does she will be referred to a Ear specialist. The thought of her going through surgery is scary, but the thought of her being deaf is worse. So all my praying people just pray for our family. Also the situation I mentioned in a previous post about me and STBH having an issue should be coming to a head at the end of this month beginning of the next. So please just pray for our family we are going to need it in the next coming month.

My new job seems like it will be something that I will like. I love working here I just need someone to come in and help me during the day. I need the help seriously I have so much work to do I don't even have time to type this up. Also due to my increase in salary I have to do the following:

1. Move (Due to my new economic status we make too much money to live here)
2. Find a new Daycare ( Due to my new economic status I would have to pay $209.00 a week for her current day care)
3. Get health insurance for my Angel ( The insurance through my new job is $159.00 to 259.00 a month depending on the coverage I choose)

So after all the changes we have to make I will actually have less money at the end of the month, but I have job security and an opportunity to go back to school. STBH and I will both be going back to school while my granny watches the baby on nights we are both at school. The next couple of years will be hard, but well worth it. The thing that makes it all worth it is in the end I will have a beautiful healthy well rounded daughter, and a loving caring supportive sexy husband by my side. STBH and I talked about it and have decided to address the most pressing issues first then the less and just take everything one day at a time. Hopefully by January or Summer of next year STBH and I will be in school.

Question of the day: I thought because we decided we both want to go back to school that STBH would agree that now is not the time to procreate again we need to wait till we finish school (I only have two more years to get my degree.) Do you know what this fool said, and I quote " you can take online classes." Why can we agree on some many other things, just not this? Do you think he would be mad if he found out I have been taking shhhhhhh... birth control pills don't tell

Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

STRESSED THE FUCK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That describes how I feel to a T!! Yesterday at work (by the way my home life is going okay right now for the most part) Dory came to me and asked me if I was going to be busy today. Apparently her supervisor and mine until I get this new job if I get it told her to ask me with help on a project she is working on. Now dory claims she does not have time to do her work, but takes off every Wednesday and talks to several people throughout the day A LOT. Me being the person I am even though I have plently of my own work to do decide to help her but only for yesterday and because I am trying to make a good impersion so I can get this new job. She told me the WRONG thing to do so I give up. All day yesterday everybody said I had a grit face and asked me what was wrong. My supervisor that asked me to do this in the first place as me if I need some caffine or somebody to lay hands on me. I work yall all day from the time I get here till the time I leave and I am still behind, because I am doing the job THREE people were doing by MYSELF. Don't nobody help me with my duties. I am sick and tired of this bullshit. If I don't get this stupid fucking job I am going to go the FUCK off on everybody!!!!!!

Okay I am done for now with my rant. In other news I thought everybody had forgotten about my short story. I will write another entry this weekend I promise MUM.

Question of the day: Does anybody know how to assemble an assualt rifle or make a bomb? I'm just curious it could be useful information one day :-)

Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

BORED!!!

I am so bored right now it is pathetic it's not like I don't have anything to do I have tons of work I just don't want to do it. Help!!! I have nothing to write today I can't get interested in anything. I am not going to bore yall two so I will post more either later today or tomorrow.

Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

Dummies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I work with a bunch of DUMMIES!!! Not everybody, but one in particular then when you name her you think of about 4 more. It is truly ridiculous. I mean Dory I have told you about her in a previous post where I don't remember, but anywho. She reminds me of bugs bunny because when you tell her how to do something (mind you this lady makes way more then I do and has been here way longer then I have) she says something to the effect of "W-W-What do y-y-you mean?" People will not tell her stuff just so they don't have to spend HOURS explaining the same thing over and over for her to still NOT understand anyway. I mean she is a nice lady but that does not get the work done I need done right. Now you all know the saying you can't teach and old dog new tricks well shit you can't teach her old tricks. I am trying to make this office more efficient for everybody benefit and my sanity. It is not working. If you don't hear from me in a couple days that either means I'm in the loony bin telling my therapist that she made me do I just couldn't tell her how to open the L drive not one more time I mean Doc you got to understand I said it about 20 times please don't send me away forever I will never strangle another person I promise as long as they don't ask me the same question more then twice, or I will be in jail trying to act all hard while the other inmates are asking me what I am in for I have to say well I flipped the fuck out on this lady then they say why what she do to you hurt your baby girl, your momma, what take your money why you flip out on home girl oh she asked me the same question 10 times and I just couldn't take it anymore. On second thought that would probably be a good thing cause all the inmates would think I was crazy and LEAVE ME ALONE. All well I know I ain't about to do that I would miss STBH and my ANGEL too much, but the thought helps me through the hard times.


Question of the Day: Do you know some things I could do to annoy her on the sneak tip? I would love to watch her go crazy for a couple of hours. HEHE!! HAHA!!

Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

News Read All About It!!

Let's see what is going on in my life:

• I got some good news. Remember the job I was telling everybody about well my "temporary" supervisor that would be my supervisor if I got the job told me yesterday that I am still a good candidate for the job and that interviews will begin within the next 2 weeks.
• My little Angel seems to be doing better. Today she was not fussy when I dropped her off at daycare. I believe her ear infection is doing better.
• My apartment complex has stated they will repair the door but only are required by lease to do exterminations 3 times a year so I will be on a cleaning frenzy this weekend. I got information from a great website from Weekends though so again Thank you very much.
• I had fun being tagged so I will play again sometime in the future.
• My car is having problems AGAIN!! I am about ready to give it up and just get another except I really don't have money for that or to fix it so I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.
• STBH and I are still doing well he is out of town for a couple of days and I miss him something terrible. I hate when he leaves me. :-(
• I have officially run out of things to say for now, but if I think of more I will post later.

Question of the day: I have changed my blog background do you like?

Smoochies,

Carmel Beauty

I have not dropped off the planet, but I may want to.

Hey Everybody,

I have been sooooooooooo busy this last week plus for the last couple of days I have had writers block and have had no ideas on what to write. Being both sleepy and busy just do not work well together. My daughter's teething is keeping the household up at night, and work is WORK. I am still doing the job that previously 3 people were doing and it is getting to me know. Big Time. Sorry I haven't posted in a while I am fine tuning the ending of Mike and Kyra's story so I should have that completed by Monday and just post it all at one time.

I can't write more now but I will on either tomorrow or Friday.

Question of the day: Does anybody know how to make me disappear like magic for a couple of days then reappear like nothing happened?


AAAAHHHHHHHHH (screaming I feel better now :-) ),

Carmel Beauty

I am so sleeeeply!!! (Yawn!!)

If you can't tell from the title bar I am extermely sleepy. My daughter went to the doctor friday and she is cutting 4 teeth two on top two on the bottom, plus she has an ear infection. So me and stbh have not slept in almost a week. We take turns but with both of us being first time parents we can't sleep when it's our turn. We both want to make it better it is ridiculous.

Anywho, here are just a few random thoughts from me.

1) Work is still crazy.
2) I will be writing up at least 2 chapters of Mike and Kyra's story this weekend maybe even
three and post those next week I want to go ahead and finish that story, because I have a
new one running through my mind as I type.
3) Hopefully my car will be working properly today.
4) If anybody knows of any blogs that write a story let me know I love to read.
5) If you haven't already check out my girl Sylvia Hubbard her book SEX WEED is really
getting GOOD!!! The link is on my side bar if you need it. Please go post a comment
asking her to write another chapter because I NEED TO KNOW MORE!!! ( Yes Sylvia I
hope you are reading this)

Question of the day: Do you think anybody would notice if I took a nap?


Praying for rest,

Carmel Beauty

A LOT of Random, A little pictures

First off I have a few bugs with the car that need to be repaired before I can start driving it. Nothing major there. I just have to wait and I have never been a patient person at all. I just hope it doesn't take longer than today to repair. I need my car by this weekend though my little family has plans.

Second my baby girl is growing so fast it is scary. I feel like I just gave birth to her yesterday and already she is standing on her own for five minutes at a time. At daycare they are moving her up to the next class. She is going to be with the toddlers now. I know this means that she will be moving along even faster. She will be walking soon and I am excited and terrified at the same time.

Third since I don't want to end up like this I better find a better way to deal with my co-workers than strangle them because even though I still want to I have no intentions of going to jail.

Question of the day: Can you tell I just figured out how to add pictures?

Looking for an anger management class,

Carmel Beauty

I AM GOING TO STRANGLE SOMEONE!!!!!!!!

I am currently at work. I have to key in data for about five different people a day. This data should be given to me in it's correct form with all of the information. The ONLY thing I should have to do is input the data. After that is done then it is then re-audited by another person. Now I say re-audited because the five people who give it to me is suppose to audit BEFORE I get it. THIS NEVER EVER EVER HAPPENS!!!!! Every time I key something I have to audit it at the same time because it is almost never correct.

What is really I mean really pissing me off is on of the main offenders is the person in the job for which I recently applied. I was told I was second choice but that she had more experience then me and was a better candidate. Now granted she has worked in a different department for 7 years and I have only been her for going on three years most of which has been in a temporary position, but this is ridiculous. It doesn't matter if they have more experience If I am doing all the work and not getting paid for it.

Another example of her laziness and ineptitude is that the person who had this job before her would do most as in 95% of there own keying as well as all the other work they do during the day. This lady does not any of her own keying also she has to send out invoices to different locations and once a month she has only been here for two months, and the last two times I have had to type up the labels and mail out the invoices because she conveniently had to take the day off when they needed to be mailed. When she is here she spends most of her time in Dory's (I will explain dory later) office they used to work together. I am tired of the abuse the job I am currently doing was done by three people. One left to work for a different company and the other moved upstate. So I am doing all the work on my own and the asshat doesn't do hardly anything, and the things she does do are WRONG.

Now not by any means do I think I am perfect, because I am not I make mistakes but when you have to tell someone over, over, and over about the same mistake I think that person is just being careless.

Dory I got her name from the movie Finding Nemo if you have seen it she reminds me of the fish that had Alzheimer's. Well the Dory is a trip and acts just like that fish it's crazy she is suppose to "re-audit" the work after I have keyed it. Guess what it is still wrong, because she doesn't have the slightest idea what she is doing either.

Now for the mistakes that I notice I will correct, but I don't go searching for them. I don't have time. I just have entirely to much work to do. I don't even have time to type this. I do feel a little better though and that was the reason for this post.

I know I have made several grammatical errors sorry hope you can understand my rant if not please let me know and I will help you out :-).

Question of the day: Is is wrong that I just noticed like A LOT of errors and said fuck it I ain't fixin' it and went on about my business like I didn't even notice it?


Breathing FIRE,

Carmel Beauty

Work

Currently I work for a temp agency. I am an assistant to the office manager. Last Friday she put in her resignation so her last day will be on this coming Thursday. With Tranquil gone I have had A LOT more work to do because since she is leaving she has decided to do less work than normal. Then yesterday her boss came to me and asked if I could take over her position after she leaves till he is able to hire a permanent person for her position. So I will have lots, lots and losts more work to do than normal. I am going to still kept up with my posting though I promise it is my only form of release. I will not be like Tranquil who hasn't posted in forever.

I will post more on Mike and Kyra on Monday.


Gotta Go so much work so little time,

Carmel Beauty