Monday, December 29, 2008


Where is a girl to start? I guess I will start with the horrible first and just go ahead and get it out of the way. On Friday December 12, 2008 I miscarried. This has not been an easy holiday for me. I wasn't sure if we would be able to handle another baby right now, but I was forming plans seeing problems and coming up with solutions and I was starting to feel better about it. I was really feeling like me and my hubby could do it. Apparently I was very wrong. I am really just going through the motions lately, and can cry at the drop of a hat, or just blank out. I took some time off from work. My boss and his wife just recently went through a miscarriage to so he was very understanding. I was only 9weeks. Everybody keeps saying what they think I need to hear and it honestly is pissing me off. I am angry that only my husband understands a little of what I feel and nobody else understands at all. I mean to me it's like I lost my child a death in the family I know it should not have been a funeral or anything , but I feel like I need some kind of closeure. Anywho, the good a while back I told everybody that my husband and I were going through a very hard situation that was causing a lot of problems in our family well it has finally been resolved. So that is one less headache for us both and for that I am truly thankful.

Okay now on to the BAD. I may just be trippin' it is possible, because I still have a lot of hormones running through my body. I just have this feeling that something is just not right we my hubby and I. I guess it could have something to do with the miscarriage, but we just aren't clicking and I don't know what to do to get "us" back.

Question of the day: Would you read a significant other's or spouses diary, and then get mad about some explicit things that your read?