Monday, July 23, 2007


Good morning all,

I have found a car. Also the situation I was referring to that hubby and I are going through seems to be improving at least I am praying that it is. We are still making wedding plans and trying to keep everything moving along at an even pace. It's hard when something knocks you off your block, but we seem to be making it.

In other news, since our recent scare with pregnancy we have been talking about additional children. During our discussions I assumed we were on the same page. That is until last night. His mother, him, & I was talking and out of no where she suggested that if we did not want to have more children now then we need to be on some form of birth control. I brought the subject up to him once we were home I asked if he wanted me to get on a better form of birth control than what we currently use (nothing). He said no. So I asked him to clarify. He stated that we will be blessed with the children God feels we should have whether that be 2 or 10. He NEVER at anytime wants me to do anything to prevent us making a baby. I told him I don't want to have an additional child right now. I thought we were under agreement I was wrong. He wants to have another NOW he feels God will let us know when is the right time. I want to discuss this issue he feels it's not open for discussion. Now I know it's my body I can do what I want. We don't believe in abortion for ourselves, although I am free choice that is just my person choice. I do believe in birth control. We have discussed children at length know we don't want to have more then 4 if that many I don't understand how this never came up before. We will discuss this again he just isn't aware of it. I will not be pregnant every year or have more then four children so something will give.

So my question today: Do you feel in this day and age that God should be your birth control? That he won't give you more children then you are suppose to have. Why or Why not?

Studying the latest birth control methods,

Carmel Beauty


Weekends Off said...

oooh tough question, On one hand, I believe God doesn't make mistakes and if a child is due to be born it will be and I also believe that he won't give you more than you can handle.

On the other hand, there are a lot of unwanted, unfortunate children out there in this world already- perhaps your fiancee would consider adopting a few in addition to a few natural kids. Then you both get what you want-kinda sorta.

Kids are expensive - is he prepared to support all of the kids he wants? Because I don't see how you could work if you have lots of kids, surely you'd have to be a SAHM or have $$$$$$$$$$$ for daycare. College alone. OMG. You need to start saving now for your baby to have college...what happens when there are 4-5 kids all needing braces and school clothes, money for team dues, uniforms, health care.

Barney said...

it is an extremely tough question and one you and the soon to be hubby.. (STBH) need to discuss and understand each other fully.

There are SO many kids out there that need loving caring homes.. not just infants, but older children too.

My religious beliefs do not come into play here, because why would God give children to drug addicts, parents who turn into child molesters, parents who just neglect them? To teens that practice unprotected/protected sex? How is THAT Gods will?

No.. God doesnt decide if you should have children or not, you & your other half and your body's determine if you should be parents?

You have to keep in mind all the additional cost's.. health care, child care, clothes, braces, unsuspecting surgeries, car insurance when they are of driving age, school uniforms (for sports or what not)college tuition, everything... the list is never ending!!!

Kids are great.. but... demanding..time, energy, finacially, emotionally, mentally, have one.. now add more to that mix.. are you prepared for him to be gone 12 or more hours a day to support the household, and you doing ALL the work..(Im not saying that's the way it is, or will be, but it's something to consider, cuz it COULD be the way it is)

Open communication is best.. you need to talk to each other, understand where each other are wanting and coming from..

Ok..I will step off my soap box..

cas said...

This IS a tough question.

I have fertility issues. My mother says that I do not have fertility issues, but that God is just not ready for me to have childern. I am to believe that He'll miraculously heal my cervix when He's ready.

I think having children is a two-person commitment. And if both partners aren't ready, it should not be entered into. Because, it's not something you can go back on.